


Before I Tell You Goodbye

by RachelZappia



Category: Star Trek RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-01-31 12:31:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18591325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RachelZappia/pseuds/RachelZappia





	Before I Tell You Goodbye

Before I tell you goodbye

“The minute this plane lands, I want those papers signed.”  
Chris Pine turned his huge Robins egg blue eyes on his soon to be ex-husband. “Love you too Zach.” The words were sarcastic, the tone bitter, only Chris’s eyes revealing a trace of sadness, of longing, buried deep within him.  
“Chris I tried. I really did. But you were more interested in elaborate parties and autograph signings than you were our marriage.”  
“Zach I loved you.” He had to bite his lip from saying “and I’m almost sure I still do.”  
“Chris face it. Our marriage was a farce, something to keep the public happily gossiping. I wanted this to work, but you acted like I was covered in poison ivy.”  
“You wouldn’t let me touch you! There was always a job, or a party, or a headache. Always an excuse Zach, each one more flimsy than the last.”  
“I begged you to fuck me! I threw myself at you like a drunken prom date! But you were always too busy out gallivanting with Karl and Zoe. Does Karl suck cock better than I do?”  
The pilot interrupted from the front of the small plane. “Gentlemen, perhaps this conversation can wait until we land.”  
“I’m not sleeping with Karl Zach. I never was.”  
“Bullshit! I see those little smirks he gives you. The way you put your hand on his arm. I’m surprised I never caught you two on set with your hands down each other’s pants.”  
“Oh fuck you Quinto.”  
“Gentlemen-“  
“I wish you would have! Maybe it would’ve saved our marriage!”  
“Gentlemen please!”  
Zach took a breath, running a hand tensely through his hair. “Sign the papers Chris. I can be rid of you once and for all and maybe I can eventually forgive myself for making such a stupid mistake by saying yes when you asked me to marry you.”  
Chris hung his long blond bangs into his eyes so Zach wouldn’t see the tears that were starting to form there. He had secretly hoped that they could work this out with a short separation, but it was obvious that Zach despised him. The fantasy of holding Zach in his arms even just one more time was only ever going to be a fantasy. All Zach wanted was to get as far away from Chris as possible.  
Chris could still remember the night they met, at a Hollywood party at someone’s elaborate and elegant mansion, the entire situation dripping in champagne, roses, diamonds, and both new and old money.   
Chris had seen Zach talking casually with some guy who could’ve been the reincarnation of Deforest Kelley but all Chris noticed was Zach. They were both drinking champagne, Zach wearing a smile that almost knocked Chris off of his feet. Their eyes locked across the room, and ten minutes later, they had left the party and were getting together for dinner in a quaint Italian restaurant on 7th.   
Then came their first kiss…  
The day Zach said I do and made Chris the happiest man alive…  
The Star Trek films and all of the teasing from friends of how their relationship was just like Kirk and Spock’s…  
But somewhere in there, and Chris wasn’t even really sure where, everything had went to hell.  
And it was all fights, screaming, accusations of cheating, and friends taking sides.   
And then came the day Zach had asked for the divorce…  
Chris was suddenly pulled from his thoughts by the realization that he was full on crying now, the tears pouring down his cheeks, blurring his vision. The want to rock Zach in his arms, to hold him as they made love, was so strong it actually was making Chris physically ill.   
But there was no way Zach would ever let Chris touch him…   
As Chris balled his hands into fists to stop himself from reaching for Zach, his bangs still in his eyes to hide the desperate tears, the pilot’s panicked voice sounded through the plane:  
“Something’s wrong! We- we’re going down!”  
It was the last thing Chris heard before everything went black.  
***   
Chris awoke slowly, head pounding, his face wet. Was it tears? Or was it blood? Or was it a combination of both?  
He was on his back, shooting pain darting in and out of his left leg like a snake. All he could remember was the cry of “we’re going down!” Had they crashed? Was Chris the only survivor in the plane?  
The thought brought sudden wave after wave of hideous bile to his throat. He reached in the darkness, groping helplessly, and grabbing nothing but shadows.  
“Chris.”  
Chris choked back a startled shriek. “Zach?”  
“Over here.” Chris reached toward the voice and managed to grab a piece of material, presumably a shirt sleeve.   
“Zach what happened?”  
“I don’t know why but the plane went down.”  
“The pilot-?”  
“He’s dead Chris.”  
“Jesus Christ. The plane-?”  
“Even if either one of us could fly it, it’s completely malfunctioned. Radios dead. We’re dead in the water Chris. We aren’t going anywhere. Not tonight anyway.”  
“What are we going to do? We can’t stay here.”  
“We’re going to have to see if we can find any shelter. Build a fire, try to signal someone, anyone.”  
Chris slowly tried to stand, whimpering like an injured animal as he put weight on his bad leg.  
“You’re hurt.” Zach’s tone was that of the blank faced professional, but in the dim light, Chris thought he saw a flicker of concern in Zach’s eyes.  
“I’ll be ok. Probably just a sprain.”  
“Are you sure you can walk on it?”  
“I don’t have a choice. Now let’s get out of this thing.”  
Moving slowly, they managed to find the door to the plane and step out into a thick wood, a full yellow moon hanging above them, looking like something in a werewolf movie. They began to stumble through the darkness, Chris whimpering and limping on his injured leg.  
“Just breathe Chris. I know it hurts, but we’re almost there.”  
Chris could almost say for sure that Zach didn’t know where there was, but he knew Zach was trying to be comforting, so he kept silent. He ached to lean on Zach, to feel Zach’s strong arm around his shoulders, guiding him through the treacherous wood, but they hadn’t touched since Zach had asked for a divorce, hadn’t even put their hand on the other person’s shoulder, and there still seemed to be some kind of invisible barrier between them, even now, in this situation.   
They walked for what felt like hours but was probably only minutes, not seeing any sign of a person, an animal, a cabin, or even a fire pit. Chris suddenly slumped to the ground, tears once again pouring down his face, this time in nothing but pain.   
Zach knelt beside him, his long fingers hovering inches away from Chris’s moist cheeks. He made a motion to reach out and stroke Chris’s right cheek, but very suddenly pulled his hand away as if Chris’s face were ablaze.   
In his mind, we are divorced. The thought caused Chris’s heart to twist painfully.  
“I don’t think we’re going to find a cabin or anything Chris. And you’re obviously in pain, so let’s just stop here for now. We can build a fire and go from there.”  
Chris nodded gratefully, shifting so that his weight wasn’t on his injured leg.   
“Stay put Chris. I’m going to find some firewood.”  
Zach wasn’t gone long. In boy scout fashion, he set up a modest fire, which blazed orange and yellow, giving some cheer to the otherwise cold and lonely night.  
Chris sat huddled in front of the fire, his arms wrapped around himself, shivering like a frightened puppy.  
“Are you cold?” Zach asked him. “Or are you in pain?”  
There was no sense in lying to him. “Both.”  
“We’re going to have to do something about your leg. I just don’t know what.”  
It seemed like a good opportunity to bring up what had been on Chris’s mind since they had stopped and set up camp. “Zach we’re going to freeze once this fire dies down.” The wooded air was chilly like a woman scorned and Chris guessed the temperature was only around forty degrees.  
“I don’t know what else we can do Chris. There weren’t any blankets or sleeping bags in the plane and we couldn’t find shelter of any kind.”  
Chris took a deep breath. “Zach I think we’re probably going to have to share body heat.”  
The sudden silence between the two was deafening.   
“Chris we’re signing divorce papers. Do you really think it makes sense to cuddle before we do that?”  
“Do you think it makes sense to be thinking about that right now? Zach there won’t be any papers to sign if we don’t survive this. We need to be thinking about how to get home and what we can do to stay alive in the meantime. The papers should be the last thing on your mind right now. We can worry about that when we get home.”  
Zach continued to remain silent.   
“Zach we don’t have to sleep together-“Chris’s voice broke on those words- “but this will heighten our chances to survive. Would you rather die than let me touch you?”  
Zach turned his big coffee colored eyes away from Chris. “No of course not.”  
“Then let’s get through this nightmare and go home.”  
Zach lay down in front of the fire, giving Chris his back. Chris positioned himself behind Zach, pressing his chest to Zach’s back. He wrapped both arms around Zach’s broad shoulders and slipped one hand up the back of Zach’s t shirt.   
Zach was stiff as a board in Chris’s arms and when he felt Chris’s hand slip up his t shirt, he arched his back, pulling away from Chris’s hand.  
“Sorry are my hands cold?” Chris wasn’t sure why he was asking the question. He knew the real answer: Zach was now repulsed by his touch.  
“A little. And also… we haven’t done this in a long time Chris. It’s bringing up a lot of stuff.”   
Chris remembered when they used to do this every night, fall asleep wrapped in one another’s arms after Chris would fuck Zach or vice versa. They were both dominants and took turns being on top.  
“What kind of stuff Zach?”  
“Chris really. We shouldn’t talk about this now.”  
“What else can we do Zach? I don’t think they’re going to give us ping pong privileges.”  
“Chris.” Zach’s tone was starting to sound desperate.  
“Zach if all goes according to plan; we’re signing divorce papers in two days. This is our last chance to get all of this out.” And to change our minds. The statement hung in the air, unsaid, suffocating, like an itchy wool blanket on a hot summer day.  
“I really want to have this done and over with but when you touch me, I still…”  
“You still feel something.” Chris’s voice was barely a whisper. It took all of his strength not to take his belt off and fuck Zach right there next to the fire. Instead he wrapped his arms tight around Zach’s shoulders and moved his hand to rest on the nape of Zach’s neck. Zach still shivered at the touch, but wasn’t as quick to pull away.  
“Chris we’re getting a divorce.”  
“Who are you trying to convince Zach? Me or yourself?”  
“Chris…”  
“Zach we haven’t signed the papers yet. Right now, we are still legally married and are just trying to survive a freak plane crash. As far as I’m concerned, until the papers are signed, and in these circumstances, if the papers are signed, you’re still sharing my bed.”  
“Chris don’t…”  
In pure instinct, Chris flipped Zach over so that Zach was on his back, Chris on top of him, one hand tweaking a nipple from underneath Zach’s tee and the other down his jeans, buried deep in his underwear, touching something of Zach’s he thought he would never have access to again.  
The free for all lasted only a moment before Zach bucked, tossing Chris off of him and into a heap next to the fire, Chris crying like a three year old in pain as well as disappointment. Zach scrambled to his feet, staring at Chris as if he had suddenly sprouted a third eye.   
“I’m sorry if I hurt your bad leg Chris. I didn’t mean to do that. Look, I’m going to get some more wood to stoke the fire. Why don’t you stay here. You probably shouldn’t be walking on that leg.”  
Zach ran into the woods as if he were being chased, leaving Chris huddled by the fire, disappointed and angry at himself.  
He shouldn’t have done that. He shouldn’t have pushed Zach so soon. But he missed his husband, missed the kisses, the smiles, the laughter, the touch. He would give every penny, every ounce of fame back, if he could just have Zach back.  
His poor me monologue was brought to an abrupt halt by soft footsteps coming from the opposite direction from which Zach ran.  
“Hello?” Chris called hopefully in the direction the footsteps were coming from. “Hey we’re over here! There was a plane crash and we need help. My husband went to get some more wood for the fire. I did something to my leg and need medical help. Do you have a radio or a phone or any way out of here?”  
Chris stopped his frantic pleas and stared in horror when he saw who had approached the fire.  
A wolf.   
Huge and hairy, with fur the color of gunmetal. It began to growl at Chris, revealing two rows of teeth as sharp as kitchen knives.  
Chris froze, trying to remain as still as possible. He hoped he didn’t have any open wounds that had attracted the beast.  
All at once, the wolf attacked, knocking Chris flat on his back, his right arm inches from the fire. He managed to grab the animal’s hairy shoulders to try and hold him at bay, but it wouldn’t work for long. The wolf was enormous and fully on top of Chris, his jaws aiming for Chris’s nape.  
Chris saw a blur of orange and yellow and felt the weight lifted of him as the wolf stalked into the forest, growling and slobbering. Chris then felt the warmth of someone’s lap as he was pulled away from the fire.  
“Chris my god are you ok?”  
It took Chris a minute to realize he was lying in Zach’s lap. “Zach?”  
“Chris did it bite you?”  
“No.”  
“Are you absolutely sure? It could’ve had rabies.”  
“No I managed to hold him off.”  
“Thank god. That thing was huge. If it had bitten you…”  
There was something in Zach’s tone that Chris couldn’t ignore. “Zach do you still love me?”  
“Chris-“  
“Zach please just yes or no.”  
“Chris for god’s sake it’s complicated. When I asked for the divorce, I was hoping we could still be friends-”  
“Zach please none of that friend’s bull shit. Do you still have romantic feelings for me?”  
“I really thought I was done with you. That our marriage was a mistake, that we had fallen out of love, that you were just going to become someone that I used to know.”  
Chris could sense that Zach had a big but in there somewhere. “But?-“ He prompted.  
“Then this happened and we started to touch after months of not even putting our hands on each others shoulders and all of that brought stuff up that I thought was dead but apparently isn’t.”  
Chris instinctively reached over and started to kiss Zach, moaning as Zach’s tongue touched his lips. They kissed for a moment, all hunger and fire, and then Zach managed to wiggle his hand down Chris’s jeans and into his briefs.   
Chris began to whimper, pressing his dick eagerly into the palm of Zach’s hand. Zach was still hesitant, his touch gentle, and Chris needed the hunger and the need that used to consume them when they fucked.   
Chris pressed so hard into Zach’s hand that it seemed it would become part of his cock, his lips buried in Zach’s nape. “Fuck me Zach.”  
“Chris you have a bad leg and you were bitten by a wolf.”  
“I wasn’t bitten.”  
“Fair enough. But your leg-“  
“Just be gentle then.”  
Zach looked deep into Chris’s eyes as if expecting to find a hidden clue there. Chris locked his eyes on Zach, begging him with no words.  
Zach gently pushed Chris down next to the fire, pressing his chest to Chris’s back. His hands began to fumble with his belt, pulling his jeans down, doing the same to Chris.  
“Chris we don’t have lube so this may hurt a little.”  
“You know this isn’t our first time Zach.” Just as long as it isn’t our last.   
Zach dribbled a mouthful of saliva carefully into Chris’s hole and then slipped a finger in.  
Chris bucked against him, moaning in pain and ecstasy interchangeably. “Easy Chris. Try to relax.”  
Zach worked the finger until he felt Chris began to un tense and then he spit once more and slid in.  
Chris whimpered and arched his back under Zach. It had been a while since they did this and the lube was non existent. Zach moved slowly, keeping a gentle pace.   
Neither of them lasted long. Zach began to thrust desperately, holding onto Chris’s shoulders as if Chris would vanish into thin air if he let go. Chris came on a whimper, Zach on a groan, both of them curling into each others arms like cold puppies afterwards.   
“Chris?” Zach whispered gently.  
“Hmmm?” Chris whispered, already half asleep in Zach’s arms.   
“Once they realize the plane didn’t land they’re bound to come looking for us. We’ll be ok.”  
Chris nodded sleepily on Zach’s shoulder.  
“And Chris?”  
“Hmm?”  
“Once we get home… the divorce papers… I’m going to tell the lawyers to shred them ok?”  
Chris’s smile almost seemed to outshine the fire.   
“We’ll do it together.”


End file.
